Faut-il changer pour son ex-partenaire ?

La vie après la fin d’une véritable relation amoureuse est toujours un virage assez délicat à prendre. Selon les cas, le doute et la mélancolie peuvent constituer l’essentiel du quotidien durant des semaines voire des mois. Mais la vie enseigne nombre de ses leçons dans la douleur. Et dans ce sens, le terme d’une relation amoureuse constitue également un moment de remise en question et d’introspection.

Une fois la rancune ou l’hostilité des premières semaines passée, les raisons profondes de l’échec commencent à se révéler. Notamment, les erreurs et les mauvais comportements de l’autre, et surtout les nôtres. Ce n’est qu’à partir de cet instant que le processus de guérison est véritablement enclenché. Et vu que les mêmes causes produisent toujours les mêmes effets, les changements seront indispensables, quelque soient les perspectives de chacun.

Ces traits de personnalité qui posent problème

Si votre objectif est de récupérer votre ex-conjoint, le mieux reste encore de tenter une nouvelle approche afin de permettre à cette histoire de repartir sur de bonnes bases. La plupart du temps, on est bien prompt à remarquer ce qui ne va pas chez l’autre. Mais dans une relation amoureuse, on est deux. Quand bien même la faute viendrait du partenaire, les responsabilités peuvent être partagées. Vous n’êtes peut-être pas celui ou celle qui a triché, mais il y avait peut-être quelque chose à faire pour l’empêcher.

Sans vouloir faire l’apologie de l’infidélité et de justifier les fautes réalisées par votre ex, un couple c’est l’association de deux individualités. Deux personnalités distinctes qui, si elles peuvent avoir énormément en commun, ont également leurs divergences. Comme le recommande de nombreux professionnels de la relation de couple à l’instar de ce site,la clé du succès et de la longévité d’un couple ou de sa reformation réside dans l’art de savoir gérer ces individualités. Cela veut dire qu’il faut se reprendre lorsqu’on a tendance à s’emporter facilement, ou au contraire affirmer sa personnalité quand on est du genre influençable. Dès lors, il faut avant tout apprendre à se connaître soi-même. Et pour ça, il n’y a rien de mieux que vos proches ; ceux-là qui vous côtoient tous les jours. Pour le meilleur ou pour le pire, on n’a souvent qu’une vision très subjective de sa propre personnalité. Il ne faut donc pas hésiter à demander de l’aide. Tout être humain devrait être en mesure de vivre par lui-même avant même de pouvoir s’épanouir dans un couple.

L’emballage, ça compte

Les changements pour la reconquête amoureuse ne portent pas uniquement sur le fond de la personnalité. Les motifs de rupture sont parfois très anodins. Ce serait donc vraiment triste qu’ils suffisent à vous priver de votre âme sœur.L’être humain est avant tout une créature pour laquelle l’apparence impact fortement sa perception.

Physiquement, aucun partenaire n’est jamais acquis pour de bon. Sans avoir à verser dans l’excès, la vie de couple c’est aussi un combat quotidien pour rappeler à son partenaire toutes les raisons pour lesquelles il ou elle vous a choisi (intellectuelles, sentimentales et bien sûr physiques).

Changer pour l’oublier

Dans le cas où vous choisirez l’option tourner la page, il faudra également se tenir prêt à quelques changements de taille. Passer à autre chose implique une prise de décision parfois radicale. Prenons comme exemple l’étape de supprimer les photos souvenirs vous ramenant irrémédiablement vers les folles envies de renouer avec votre ex-partenaire. Cette étape-ci semble être assez anodine, pourtant, beaucoup ont du mal à la passer correctement. Effacer certaines images de son téléphone permettra de les sortir progressivement de sa mémoire. De plus, ça peut être un excellent moyen de surmonter son chagrin d’amour et garder uniquement les bons souvenirs de son idylle. 

Quelques conseils pour changer et passer à autre chose

Étapes à suivre

  • Accepter

Il faut garder en tête que le changement fait partie de la vie. Juste le fait de l’accepter nous permet de passer un cap important dans notre processus de développement personnel. En acceptant la séparation et en sortant progressivement de sa zone de confort, on arrive à affronter des situations nouvelles qui nous permettront d’avancer et dépasser cette peur du changement.

  • Faire appel au bon sens

Toutes les situations se produisent pour une bonne raison. A vous de la connaître et d’identifier sa signification afin de prendre les meilleures décisions et aligner ses attentes pour les rendre réalistes.

  • Rester ouvert au changement

Apporter un regard neuf sur les choses paraissant anodines peut aider à adopter une meilleure approche de la vie. En effet, cela permet de solliciter son sens de l’observation et ses réflexes ; ceci, en vue de les aiguiser. Ce regard neuf vous permettra de transformer certaines situations paraissant désagréables en leçon de vie.

 

Conclusion

À l’issue d’une séparation, le changement semble être une réelle obligation afin de bien faire face à la situation. Quel que soit l’itinéraire emprunté, il faut envisager un passage par cette étape-ci.  Et afin d’être prêt à affronter chaque situation, il vaut mieux être au courant d’un maximum de paramètres, accepter et apprécier tout ce qui va arriver.

 

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